Parenting Today

A series of free talks is to be held in Wexford throughout 2018 at Gorey, Enniscorthy, Bunclody and New Ross libraries.

“Parenting Today” has been launched by Councillor John Hegarty from Wexford County Council, who is a parent and Deputy Principal of a Boys’ Secondary School. This programme is designed to support parents and guardians in their daily parenting challenges.  Talks have been structured by and will be delivered by professionals from the care, education and health sectors.

In his address, he highlighted to us that parenting is the only job where there is no previous experience required, there is no formal training undertaken, you can’t quit and there are lives at stake.”

The schedule of talks have been organised by the Wexford County Council Public Library Service and County Wexford Children and Young People Services Committee (CYPSC) and the funding for the projects has been provided by the Department of Children and Youth Affairs.

WexfordToday learned from Ms. Sheila Barrett of Wexford CYSPC who detailed how they had identified the need for these talks when developing their “Children and Young People’s Plan: 2017-2019”. The Wexford Library Service has collaborated with them in preparing for these structured talks and in bringing them to fruition.

Topics include healthy meal planning, language development, breastfeeding, childcare, dyslexia, numeracy development and learning needs.

There will also be information events on issues such as special childcare provision; supports for people parenting children with autism; positive mental health; bullying; cyber safety and suicide prevention.

In order to attend any of the scheduled talks, you can contact your local library to reserve your place. The next scheduled talks will address the topics of Bilingualism on May 1st; Eating Disorders on May 8th and Positive Mental Health on May 25th next at 19.00 at Wexford Town Library.

The keynote inspiring and practical talk was given by Stella O’Malley on Tuesday 24th April last in Wexford library.  Ms. O’Malley is a published author and practicing psychotherapist who has published Cotton Wool Kids and Bullyproof Kids respectively.  She explored how the relentless pressures from society and social media are all-pervasive and gave guidance and strategies on how best to handle them. The focus was on raising our children with a more relaxed and joyful approach, by becoming more in touch with the outdoors and the community around you.

It is a fact that social trends are impacting on parents and their children more than ever before.  Loving parents are becoming incredibly anxious about their children in an increasingly uncertain world, obsessing over every little thing that goes wrong. We need to lighten up a little in our parental role.  We need to realise that “it’s okay” and forgive ourselves for not being perfect as we are all fallible and to let our children see us making mistakes by not having full control of everything that happens in their lives.  That is the human condition and we should embrace it as such as, “to err is to be human”.

The advice is to take full responsibility for our own behaviour and to model this frequently.  Further, if we encourage our children to make mistakes and explore their interests, passions and their skills outside of our current boundaries which will instill confidence and resilience in us all and allow us to evolve into authentic personalities in our own right with a well-defined place in the world.  If we parent from our authentic selves, it really counts, so be honest and lead by example.

The main tenet of this talk, as understood by WexfordToday.com is: Bring your fallible self to the game-plan and identify what it is that is knocking the joy out of your parenting.  Explore the fun stuff and learn to enjoy the parenting experience again if it has become a struggle or overwhelming.

It was impressive to hear the sage advice: Take a year out if you have to and give a gift of time to yourself by getting to know yourself and finding your happy place so that you can teach your children how to evolve into the very best version of themselves that they can possibly be.  This is something we can gift our children and loved ones.

That’s the ultimate life-skill and certainly an antidote to the bullying suffered by many children in our midsts today.  Schools are being proactive in this regard and teaching these skills in the hidden curriculum so as parents, it seems, we cannot afford to miss out on this valuable opportunity to connect more effectively, to improve the emotional tone of our homes and to enlighten ourselves on what it is to truly live in the moment and to be happy.  We need to let our children see us being happy and doing it for ourselves so that they can learn this too.

The only question remains is, can you really afford not to, when the mental health of one in four people in Ireland today is adversely challenged.